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‘’I may be an idiot, but I’m right.’’ -Trey Jadlow, 2016

Basic Description Edit

Trey Jadlow aka "The Kansas Tooth Fairy", is a tooth maker extraordinaire and disciple of the two bit hack theologian RC Sproul. Trey, who looks like one of the more inbred of the Romanov Tsars, is a comically dense pontificating self taught idiot with a head full of dentine instead of grey matter.

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Trey is divorced (no, not just from reality) and for years spent his time broadcasting the same hangout from an abandoned sixties sci-fi B movie set, mostly to newbies who know nothing of his deceptive shyster act. Now rare on Google+, for years Trey spent his days slowly inhaling the fumes leaking from his dental lab whilst chuckling at sincere attempts by people smarter than him to understand what the hell he was talking about.

Trey is fluent in the rare language of gobbledygook, a variant of severely contorted pidgin Aristotelianism found only inside the rather pokey void between his ears. Trey considers that, whilst self taught from an introductory YouTube series by RC Sproul, that after engaging with dozens of highly informed laymen and even PhD’s, he, a man that ‘Dolts of America’ refused membership (on the grounds of being a little too stupid) has “never received a successful objection” against his woeful argument.

Trey considers himself a philosophy guru and “deep thinker” despite the depth of his grasp of the subject being shallower than the plaque he scrapes off the teeth of the dead. Superficially Trey projects a Ned Flanders-esque charm but beneath the surface runs a vast abyssal pool of intense burning hatred towards unbelievers.

Trey has a very short memory, akin to a goldfish suffering from Alzheimer's. He often forgets, in the same thread of comments fundamental objections to his position.

Trey Jay’s Argument from Contingency Edit

Trey operated in the community with a Ted Bundy-esque approach to apologetics. Trey would superficially smile with faux self deprecation at his latest victim, humbly inviting new members of the Google+ community into a one on one hangout with him "just to chat". But once he'd gone live on air, Trey would try and intellectually beat them around the head with an inflated mallet of ignorance.

Chief among Treys limited arsenal was his deformed freak of an "argument" taken from RC Sproul- a version of the contingency argument. Trey himself (after many tortuous attempts at getting him to formulate the argument) formalizes it as such:

P1. If contingency exists, God exists

P2. Contingency exists

C. Therefore God exists.

Though operationally valid, the argument Trey forwards only really gets stupid when he attempts to argue for premise one. Trey believes to deny it means that atheists must invoke ‘self creation’ or they must ‘violate the law of noncontradiction’. Trey’s response to objections is to laugh condescendingly, ignore them, forget them, or spout gobbledygook. Trey will usually not answer questions directly, preferring instead to reply with questions of his own, usually just deploying a synonym of the concept just objected to: e.g. “but does that happen?” “but is that change?” Etc, followed by a condescending chuckle or insistence that his interlocutor is a fool.

Trey considers his argument necessarily true such that to deny any premises is to invoke contradictions. So brainwashed is Trey (though to wash his brain takes but a single drop of water) that all objections his mind receives are dumped in the “violation of the law of identity” or “violation of the law of noncontradiction” box despite Trey being unable to demonstrate any such violation.

Trey’s formulation of the argument is pretty much set in stone. He makes no attempt to further his understanding or bolster the case for his argument. Trey is utterly blinkered, and believes, following Sproul, that philosophy peaked with Saint Thomas Aquinas, and has been downhill since.

Trey and Science Edit

Trey considers ‘deduction’ one half of the scientific method. Trey considers the theory of evolution as a ‘just so story’ that can’t possibly be true- because… unintentionality can not intend intention.

Trey is also a young Earth creationist. He rarely argues for this however. But he does believe that the fact that humans wear clothes is evidence of the ‘shame’ inherited from Adam and Eve upon expulsion from the garden of Eden.

Trey’s asks ‘what is time?’ and answers with the Thomistic/Aristotelian response of ‘matter in motion’. He considers the B-Theory of time laughable, an attempt by Atheists to avoid his argument. And Yet God exists timelessly on Trey’s view, and is unchanging.

Trey also considers that it is logically impossible that an event could be uncaused. Apparently uncaused events in physics (like nuclear decay) while apparently having no efficient cause, just really must have because he says so.

Trey thinks that he couldn’t lift his little finger without God ‘the powerpack of the universe’ helping him out.

Analogical Language Edit

Trey’s brainwashing has given him an escape hatch when feeling the heat- anything and everything apparently incoherent in his view is actually coherent after all, and this is due to ‘analogical language’ being unable to catch the sense in which God is ‘other’. Of course, Trey fails to demonstrate the sense in which God is actually analogous to the concepts being invoked, preferring to sidestep the objection, or laugh condescendingly (or ask his interlocutor if they like him). If everyone were to use this escape hatch as Trey does, any apparent incoherence in a view could be swept away with an appeal to 'analogical language.' Unsurprisingly, TreyJay dismisses this charge by either ignoring it or... laughing condescendingly.

Meta-Narrative Edit

Trey’s idiocy extends beyond his man crush upon RC Sproul.  Dr. Robert A. J. Gagnon is another influence on Trey’s diminished reasoning capacity. From Gagnon, Trey derives his transphobia, and his belief that we are in need of being saved by the ‘Christian Meta-narrative’. Trey offers no argument for why ‘we are all doomed’ simply taking it as a given that since his wife left him, the world must be falling apart and in need of thinking exactly like he does. Trey considers the world in a ‘new dark age’ despite all those record high life expectancies and low level of famine, access to knowledge about the universe, and technology. This explains why the ‘atheeust’ he interacts with, fail so spectacularly to agree with him. Trey’s meta-narrative prediction is for something terrible to befall humanity for turning its back on the Christian meta-narrative- he looks to Europe as an example, which is ‘falling apart’ as a result of its new dark age.

Trey and Pro-Life Edit

Trey is an ardent pro-lifer, and has eight children. He thinks of human life as holding within it ‘the sanctity of existence’ which of course, all humans ascribe to and only comes from his God. Trey has in the past posted graphic images regarding abortion during  the period that fake news circled around Planned Parenthood apparently ‘selling babies body parts’.

Trey and the Google+ Community Edit

Trey is almost exclusively active now on Facebook as a result of the Google+ Community tiring of his flagrant dishonesty and dogmatic refusal to acknowledge the objections to his position. Trey after many interactions with penis doodling cartoon maker Bert Poole, decided that the atheists on Google+ were ‘disgusting’ and ‘filthy’ and unwilling to listen to his awesome argument because they wished to wallow in their sin. Trey retired, only occasionally emerging to have hangouts on air with people he had groomed on Facebook.

Trey has many critics in the Google+ community. He is bereft that Dr Alex Malpass ‘won’t talk to him’ and he has accused Ozymandias Ramses II of being frightened to ‘debate’ him live on air (to which Ozy famously responded ‘’He’s nobody’s bitch’’).

The Beard of Contingency Edit

In 2016, Trey finally convinced something he was right, and his own beard became aware of it’s own contingency, and effused into the Google+ community to educate ‘atheeusts’ on their ignorance of the brilliance of Trey’s argument. The beard even surpassed Trey’s own ability to coherently discuss the argument, often appearing on threads with Trey to set people straight.

An example of the Beard’s genius: Edit

‘’I was chiselling a canine when it suddenly dawned on me, the close shave those who deny the sanctity of existence have with the one who is analogically communicable in its analytic nature, he who says "I AM WHO I AM" that is, that which is pure act in his purposive intentionality of self existence.

I think that shows how silly that 'just so' story of unintentional non purposiveness of purposing that which changes to intend is purpose before it has happened, that which the atheeusts deem 'evolution' a logical extrapolation of self creating law of non contradiction invoking magic- which I deem the Texas sharp shooter fallacy.’’