Basic Description Edit
G Man is a squawking idiot who doesn't even understand the simplest of concepts. Ideas that are available to infants fly right over G Man's head like a Learjet as he primes himself for his trademark "Let me axe you a question...". If you watch G Man's hangouts you can actually see the moment where he stops listening, usually a second or so after the other person has started to talk. G Man is the sole member of "errrrrrr Preaching to the Choir Ministries" and, whilst being oblivious to the fact that preaching to the choir is considered to be a bad thing, to date has managed to convert precisely zero people to his witless brand of radical, evangelical Christianity.
G Man is very particular with who knows his real name despite doxing himself on at least seven different occasions. He has Mentioned his name in comments sections, in his own videos and he has his name in his Paypal account. G Man's real name is so well known that there is no need to repeat it here.
G Man's Hobbies involve marathon running, endangering the health of himself and others as he makes videos whilst riding his bike without a helmet, humiliating himself on the internet, and watching wrestling.
G Man is the current Headmaster of "The G Man Center For Kids Who Can't Read Good And Wanna Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too."
G Man has an almost morbid fascination and obsession with white women. Dragnauct pointed this fact out years ago but has recently become blatantly obvious to others of the GDC. G Man's penis has been rather depressed ever since he discovered that his archenemy Reds Rhetoric was in a relationship with his latest vanilla fantasy, Hana Zubby.
G Man is the flagship member of the CCP and is probably the most well known. Even though he came later than TrueEmpiricism, he's made a name for himself by fulfilling every negative black racial stereotype that exists.
G Man's noted for having almost no comprehensive understand of literally every topic he speaks on, something that most would consider an impossibility. Many speculate that this is due to some mental impairment as G Man has the propensity to behave like a petulant child quite often. Like TrueEmpiricism, G Man lacks the ability to think critically or introspect, instead choosing to blame his interlocutors for the decline of a conversation, neglecting the fact that his constant interruptions, blatant insults, and ill temper were the actual culprits.
G Man's mental capabilities have been the subject of debate for as long as he's been on youtube/google+. It's clear to all parties that he views the world in a strict dichotomy, leaving little room for grey area. Only recently has he acknowledged exceptions to any given scenario, but only mentions them as footnotes.
Fun Facts Edit
G Man gets upset when his elk gets goated.
DO NOT ask G Man about a 'RED BUTTON'!
G Man, like many radical evangelist morons on the internet, has the two-dimensional mindset of a small child (where they think "If I close my eyes, they can't see me"). As a result, if someone says something that G Man believes to be untrue, they are automatically 'lying'.
Doesn't understand that you can't DMCA someone for using his real name or saying something that he doesn't like.
Thinks that Peter Pan and Robin Hood are different versions of Pan, the god of nature.
Thinks the reason men have nipples is to navigate in the dark.
Claims the Kalam argument is a good argument for the existence of God, but doesn't know what the Kalam argument actually is.
Claims that Catholics aren't Christians, but will utilize Catholics when he wants to play the numbers game so that Christianity is the world's biggest religion.
Thinks grass is poisonous.
Maintains that dogs (and humans) are not Eukaryotes.
Thinks GMOs (Genetically Modified Organisms) are created by injecting...something...into fully grown and harvested food products (like a butchered chicken breast), and are bad because (obviously) it's The Man™ trying to poison us again. Or something.
Famous Quotes Edit
"There are no starving Christians."
"Atheists don't exist."
"Adam and Eve might not have had 46 chromosomes." (paraphrase)
- Bull-Horn Master
- Fastest "Wait a minute, Wait a minute, Wait a minute, Wait a minute, Wait a minute" in New Jersey... his trademark technique to stop someone making sense to him.
- Impervious to arguments due to his capacity to not listen.
- Ability to find perfectly good safes, filled with cash, that have been thrown in the trash in poor neighborhoods.
- Keeps on "axing" questions even after being corrected on the proper grammar.
- Can Dox himself and his workplace and then blame others.
- The ability to think that if he persists in obsessing over certain atheists (such as Alex Botten or Matt Dillahunty) they will come to his hangout without notice and deal with him, even if they are +5 hours ahead of him and it's 4am.
- Declaring himself the winner of absolutely every single argument, ever.
G Man's Greatest Hits Edit
Assorted G Man Arguments Edit
(Please add descriptions, details, and shortcomings for each.)
Answered Prayer Argument
The answered prayer argument was used by G Man to excuse him stealing from someone's safe. G Man was behind on the rent and prayed for divine assistance and this assistance came in the form of a safe full of cash that G Man found. Instead of doing the decent thing and reporting the find to the relevant authorities, G Man pocketed the cash for himself. Astonishingly G Man considers this theft to be something to boast about, although it has been rumored that G Man simply made the whole incident up, rendering him only a liar as opposed to a thief and a liar.
Generally though, this argument goes as follows: "The Bible says that God will (sometimes) answer prayers. Sometimes, when people pray for things, they get what they prayed for. Therefore, God exists and the Bible is 100% correct." Firstly, G Man has not proven that it is not possible to tell the difference between God saying "yes" and something that would have happened anyway (fate/luck/coincidence), or the difference between God saying "no", God saying "wait", God not responding at all, or God not existing. Also, there's the obvious fact that this argument could (by replacing a few words) be used by any religion, ideology, or belief system that includes prayer and would be just as effective, so can't be used to specifically support Christianity or its god.
Natural God Argument
Dogs Live for Millions of Years
Men use their Nipples for Navigation in the Dark and for Mucus Production
Debunking the No True Scotsman Fallacy by Being: The Chocolate Atheist
"Atheist Have no Morals"
Adam and Eve Knew of Good and Evil BEFORE They Ate the Fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil
"It's Only Adultery if you Don't Get Permission From your Spouse"
Chromosome Number is Related to How "Evolved" an Organism is
The "God of the Gaps" Fallacy Doesn't Apply to Christians
G Man Thinks GMOs are a Type of Hormone Comprised of Organisms fed to Chickens to Make Them Fat, Which in Turn Makes People Sick and Gives them Heart Attacks... and He's Waging a 1-Man War Against Them
G Man on Evolution Edit
G Man's style of "argumentation" against evolutionary biology is "axing" very (very) dumb questions that are, in his mind, brilliant gotcha questions that no "evilutionist" can answer, which shows "just how stupid their position is". When G Man's sees another person struggling to respond after hearing one of his questions he just "axed", he takes it as confirmation that his questions are hitting the mark. However, the real reason people are often flabbergasted after hearing his questions is that they are dumbfounded by the stupidity of the questions that exposes G Man's lack of understanding of even the basics of biology. Sometimes, the question isn't even related to the topic, which exposes his lack of understanding even further. Another aspect of his style is (not always, but very often) (1) not letting another person respond for more than a couple of seconds without interruption and (2) refusing to give straight answers to questions directed at him. He uses this tactic not exclusively during discussions on evolution though.
Most of his questions are based on gross misconception of what evolution is and how it works, which are easily corrected during any high school class on biology. Whether the questions are based on his utter ignorance on the subject or his dishonest straw-man versions of evolution (or a combination of both), is a mystery that only God knows the answer to. Because most of his questions contain claims about what evolutionary biologists claims, it prompts others to "axe" for the source for his claims. He usually responds by saying "I got it from you guys!", even when no one ever said what he claimed they said. When someone goes further and "axes" for a citation to a science textbook as the source for his claims, G Man completely dodges the question.
His favorite question he often "axed" (paraphrased):
"How can a dog turn into a non-dog?"
He never phrase this question correctly. The proper way to "axe" it is this: "How can a population of dogs become a population of non-dogs after many generations?" His inability to phrase the question this way probably stems from his lack of understanding (or refusal to understand) that evolution is a change (in allele frequencies) within a population (not an individual) over generations (not during an organism's lifespan). However, even when the question is asked properly, the proper answer is pointing out that no evolutionary biologist has ever suggested this can happen. In fact, they state the very opposite. According to the principle (or law) of monophyly, organisms that are descendant of any clade would still be a member of that clade. Canids (i.e. dogs) will always be canids and so will all their descendants be, and they will also be mammals, just like humans and their descendants are and will always be mammals. This has been explained to G Man many times. He usually ignores most of the answers he gets, especially the ones he doesn't
like expect. Eventually, this one answer got through to his thick skull. However, he still got some more questions he would like to "axe" about this. These are quoted verbatim:
"If you are saying a dog will never become a non-dog, right, a dog is always going to be a dog. How am I related to a dog? I am a human being. I am not a dog.”
"If you are saying that canines are always going to be canines, and I am a human being and I am not a canine. How am I related to them?” (source)
The only way these questions can make any sense is that G Man has the misconception that humans evolve from dogs and thus either violating the rule "a dog will never become a non-dog" or it would mean that humans are still dogs. Of course, he wouldn't except that humans are dogs (and nobody in their right mind would) which is why he states in his question "I am a human being. I am not a dog". Humans didn't evolve from dogs. Humans and canids evolve from an ancestral species. That species was neither a human species nor a dog species. G Man would probably think that this still violates the rule, but it doesn't. Dogs cannot turn into non-dogs, but that doesn't mean that dogs cannot come from something that wasn't a dog. Even though it wasn't a dog nor a human, the common ancestor of humans and dogs was a placental mammal (and also a tetrapod, vertebrate, chordate, deuterostome, animal and eukaryote). Both humans and dogs STILL are placental mammals, which is in agreement with the principle of monophyly. Here is a more detailed answer to these dumb questions.
Like most creationists, G Man is unable and unwilling to understand that humans are animals according to the biological definition. The word "animal" in non-scientific contexts is often used in many different ways, most of the time in a pejorative manner. Someone who says "That person is such an animal" is taken to mean that the person is behaving uncivilized, wild, aggressively, on instinct alone without reason. Humans have lumped all these negative attributes onto other creatures they deemed inferior, based on their superiority complex called "Anthropocentrism", which often takes the form of the phrase "God created mankind in his own image". According to this sense, calling someone an "animal" is like saying the person is not human (or sub-human). This is why G Man finds it offensive when the evil "evolutionists" call him an animal. This is total nonsense of course. Having a basic knowledge of human history, everyone knows that humans can be and still are very aggressive and often act without reason. We are the only species, aside form one of our close relatives, Pan troglodytes "the common chimpanzee", who wage wars. Also there are animals who are very peaceful when compared to us. Our other close relative, the bonobo, has quite literally a "make love, not war" life style. And you cannot behave any less wild and aggressive than a sloth, unless you are a sponge. Because different animals can behave completely different, the common creationist argument:
"Evolution lowers man from the “image of God” to the level of an animal. Why then should he not behave as one, in his own life and towards others?" Source: AiG
Makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. The word "animal" has a clear and unbiased definition in biology. Animals are multi-cellar, eukaryotic organisms. Meaning they are living things that are made of multiple cells, each of them containing (or contained) a nucleus. Animals are also heterotrophic, meaning they cannot fix carbon, meaning they cannot convert inorganic carbon (like carbon dioxide) into organic compounds that are used as building blocks for growth or broken down to release energy. If an organism doesn't acquire any organic compounds, it will eventually die. Fungi are also heterotrophs, thus both fungi and animals must consume organic compounds that are already by or present in other organisms. However, fungi consumes organic compounds by secreting enzymes into the environment and absorbing the dissolved (not degraded) organic compounds from the outside. Animals (and only animals) on the other hand, acquire organic compounds by ingesting other organisms (or their produce) and digesting them internally. Further characteristics of animals are; being motile at some stage during their lives and their body plan becomes fixed after development. In summary:
Animals are heterotrophic, multi-cellular, eukaryotic organisms that need ingest and internally digest other organisms (or their produce) in order to survive. They are at some point motile and their body plan becomes fixed after development. Taxonomically, animals are members of the kingdom Animalia, also called Metazoa. Phylogenetically, all animals share a common ancestor which is not shared by any non-animal, thereby forming a monophyletic taxon (also known as a clade).
By definition humans are animals, both according to their characteristics and phylogeny. And humans have been classified as animals (and more specifically as primates) by the christian creationist Carl Linnaeus 74 years before Darwin was born.
When G Man is confronted with all this, he just "axes" more stupid questions or says something amazingly dumb like:
"According to you, humans are not humans, they are animals."
Apparently according to him, when you are saying that humans are animals you are saying that humans are not humans, since something cannot be a human and an animal at the same time. That is of course wrong, because humans can be both humans and animals at the same time in the same way dogs can be both dogs and animals at the same time. After being explained that humans are a species of animals and animals are a taxonomic kingdom, G Man had this to "axe":
"If humans are a species and animals are a kingdom, who is their king?"
The only proper response that was (and could be) given:
Dumbfuck of the Year Award Edit
G Man is the winner of the "DFotY" award for 2015 with 120 votes, more than twice the number of votes as Brett Keane, the runner up, with only 49 votes.Reds Rhetoric's "THE 2015 "DUMBFUCK OF THE YEAR" AWARD CEREMONY" (1/11/15) Special note: Due to the extreme chance of G Man winning the DFotY every year, new rules had to be instated by Reds Rhetoric that someone could only win the award once in order to allow other dumbfucks to have a potential shot at the title. Red may be ...., but don't let anyone ever say he's not merciful.